Saturday, September 12, 2009
Saturday, July 4, 2009
College Students Success Secrets - Overcoming Adversity, Knock the T Out of Can't
Conquer your fears, transcend your limitations, and be a college student success story by overcoming adversity and knocking the T out of can't. Only believe and you can achieve success. Overcoming adversity may be tough, but any college student can overcome with these simple success secrets.
When I entered college and went through growing pains, I realized I was in store for some new challenges for which I had never been forewarned. My parents encouraged my academic success throughout high-school into college, but never bothered to prepare me for the rigors of college life and academics.
There is a big difference in college between knowing you "what" you need to do and knowing "how" to do it. Unfortunately many college professors (perhaps by reason of being in the trenches of academia too long) are not always so helpful in that regard. Plus it is often hard to find someone as a college student who you can relate to who also has some intelligence who can guide and counsel you.
Sadly even college counselors sometimes treat you like another problem in their caseload rather than a genuine person needing someone with a heart to talk to. That being said here are some success secrets to help any college student overcome adversity on their university campus.
1. Stay calm and cool.
When you stay calm and cool, what you need to do will more easily come to you.
Just acknowledge and recognize your present problem, after which set in your heart the intention to tackle it once you know what to do. Upon setting your intent to tackle and deal with this problem, you assuredly will eventually figure it out and take it out!
2. Listen intently, ask questions, and seek out intelligent people.
The more you listen, the more you learn. Those two ears attached to the side of your head are there for a reason. Unfortunately most people prefer to move their mouth a million miles a minute to vocalize their problem, rather than solve it.
Problem solvers however know the secret to solving problems successfully is to quietly process the problem, design a strategy to solving it, and inviting intelligent people around you to help you figure out how to tackle it.
Humbly yourself and ask questions of those around, preferably those with intelligence who can provide good advice and tell you what they would do. As you listen and gain varying perspectives, eventually intuitively it will come to you what it is you should do.
3. Don't despise the process as you sort through the pieces.
Everybody wants to be a college student success story, but success doesn't come overnight. You have to make the grades for four years and remain focused through the many attractive distractions throughout college.
As in obtaining a degree, wherein is required the completion of various coursework, overcoming adversity sometimes requires life work and internal home work as you sort through the pieces to your ordeal.
When my mom died prematurely due to a drunk driver hitting her, I had to process some of my unanswered questions and find closure. This was not done easily and took time. Likewise must you most likely give yourself some time to sort through the personal pieces and elements to that which is presently testing and challenging you. Embrace the process regardless of the present pain, knowing assuredly that as you do you will grow through and get up above your problem eventually.
Once you rise above it, you will then be able to objectively look down and back at it to see more clearly. When that time comes, you will simultaneously be able to comfort and lift others currently suffering in a similar dilemma as you. Therefore your present suffering is not in vain, as truly it will empower you to help others just the same.
4. Celebrate your progress.
Celebrate your small successes and steps forward.
When I was hit by a drunk driver (another drunk driving accident years after my mom was killed) and my car was totaled, I was injured physically and great crushed financially. I was already suffering financially before the accident. The drunk driving accident however pushed me over the edge. Suddenly I was now having to use rental cars for months, fight my insurance company for payment, visit medical doctors continually, and sort through stacks of legal documents and medical bills nonstop.
At one point I foolishly said and thought it would have been better if the drunk driver would have killed me, because the pain of the present situation after the accident was crushing and killing me. It is safe to say I was overwhelmed and miserable.
Nevertheless serendipitously a car dealer showed up in my life and offered to personally finance a car for me to buy (since my credit was ruined after the accident and I couldn't get a decent loan from a car dealer). I was so thankful and appreciative.
Nevertheless I had to make car payments in the range of $2,000 a month, while trying to live off a teaching salary of $2,600 a month and pay a mortgage on my house. Incidentally, those 6 months were very challenging.
Yet when I finally made that last car payment, I rejoiced and sighed a sigh of relief.
Sometimes it is the little things in life that we most take for granted, but suddenly begin to appreciate when they are swiftly removed from us.
I therefore gave thanks to God and rejoiced upon making that final car payment.
What are you thankful for today? As you begin to give thanks something will arise within you, whereby you will be lifted above your adversity and the ability to overcome will mightily move you forward.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude and apply these marvelous success secrets to work miracles in your life and propel you happily and successfully through college into your dream career!
Wishing you great and continued success!
Do You Make These 7 Common Mistakes and Bore People Half to Death?
Lee Iacocca
“The best way to be boring is to leave nothing out.”
Voltaire
One way to make conversations a lot more awkward and unfulfilling is to bore people to half to death. Sometimes you don’t even know you are doing it (that’s at least what I have done). So today I’d like to list 7 common mistakes that I have made in conversations to help myself – and maybe someone else too – to avoid them in the future.
If you find you might make one or a few of these mistakes a bit too often don’t beat yourself up about it. That’s pointless. Just be conscious of it in your daily interactions and do the best you can to improve.
1. Babbling on.
I have found it to be helpful to be reasonably brief when, for example, telling someone a story. The long and very convoluted version seldom seems to be as appreciated as the shorter and snappier one.
Babbling on too much is, at least in my opinion, something that often comes from being too focused inward. Being too focused on yourself in a conversation.
If you instead focus more outward you’ll be less self-conscious. This reduces nervousness and slightly nonsensical babbling.
And if you focus more outward, on the people you are talking to and less on your own glorious voice and golden words you’ll be more aware of what you are saying and how the conversation is going. If you focus on the other guy/gal you’ll be more focused on getting through and you are more attentive to how your message comes across and what reactions you bring out.
2. Clinging to a topic like a drowning man.
Hanging on to a topic for too long can make a conversation boring and awkward. Often there is a natural transition from topic to topic. But if you keep coming back to the same topic over and over again or cling to it while the other(s) want to move on then you are interrupting the flow.
This can also evolve into a situation where you feel you need to be right at all costs. That’s when things tend to get really awkward. Try lightening up and letting go if you feel that is a common problem you are experiencing.
It can be interesting to listen to someone talking a lot about their passion in life. But you still have to be flexible, let the conversation flow back and forth and be mindful of the fact that not everyone will be so interested in something as you are.
A lot of the time people just want to share moments, exchange positive emotions and feel like they are connected by for example being able to relate to you in some way. I still think you talk about a hobby or passion no matter how odd it may be but it is helpful for you and the other person to avoid technical jargon, acronyms and details that only you and other enthusiasts understand.
Try to keep it simple and understandable instead. No one wants to listen to a topic that they can’t relate to in some way. Not for too long at least.
3. Being negative and whiny.
Now, it’s normal to have a bad day or just be in bad or whiny mood from time to time. But if you do it a lot or pretty much all the time, if you spend most of your time in that headspace then simply put people will probably not just be bored. They will start to avoid hanging out/talking to you.
We all have a lot going on today. And as I grow older it seems to me that people simply don’t have time or patience to listen to that negative stuff. They have more exciting things to do and more positive people that they will choose to hang out with and talk to instead.
I’d say that one of the most attractive qualities a person can have is a positive attitude and energy. It is attractive to people at your job/school, family, friends or just that cute girl/guy in the bar. And as I mentioned above, I think that one of the big things people want in any relationships is positive emotions. On a fundamental level people simply want to create a flow back and forth with people where all of you exchange positive emotions and feel good.
It is often said that enthusiasm is contagious. So is every other feeling. So not just the words you say but the mood you are in has a big effect on how people react to you and interactions and relationships develop. So be careful with your emotional states. Here is a guide to how I have improved my own attitude and maintain it at a more positive level than I used to.
4. Not listening.
Not really listening is perhaps one of the biggest mistakes people make. It has certainly been one of my biggest issues in conversations and although I think I have improved it still is.
If you are just waiting for your turn to talk instead of listening then you’ll often miss much of what is said (verbally or non-verbally). There will be a lack of genuine understanding and disconnect that makes the conversation less exciting than it could be.
Just like I mentioned in tip #1, focusing outward and on the other person and not on yourself makes it a lot easier to be a better listener.
5. Thinking it’s all about me, me, me!
So it’s pretty obvious from what you have already read so far in this article that if you focus too much on yourself then a conversation or any sort of relationship will probably become pretty boring. You will become a bad listener. You will tend to prattle on endlessly about what you like to talk about.
People are interested in themselves. That is one big reason why for example a lot of people always think everyone is thinking or talking about them and so they become shy or they don’t experience the sort of social freedom that they could.
People want to be understood and feel a connection. If you can shift your focus away from yourself, away from having your focus split between yourself and the person you are talking to then you will be a powerful and exciting exception in their week, month or life.
6. Asking a million questions.
This can become really boring pretty quickly.
A few ways to avoid this is to:
- Make statements. Mix things up and instead of asking what someone’s favorite sports team is, just declare what yours is and see what they have to say about that. And don’t be worried about making a statement the other person may not agree with. That’s ok, they won’t get mad. Instead they probably like that you are being proactive and open and are sharing what you really think instead of putting up a front to avoid a confrontation and to get them to like you.
- Try being quiet if there is a pause. There are sometimes pauses in conversations. You don’t have to be the one to always dive in and ask a new question to get thing rolling again. Try just being at ease with being quiet and let the other person continue instead.
7. Not being right here, right now.
This is perhaps the biggest mistake one can make. And if one can avoid it then many of the other problems above tend to reduce themselves.
Being present is not a magic pill but in a conversation it can be huge.
You are right there and you are listening just to what the other person is saying. You focus is not split. You are not thinking about what to say. Instead you let the conversation evolve naturally as you say what comes to mind. You are more relaxed, positive and open because you are not somewhere in the past or future reliving bad experiences or imagining some horrible scenario.
In this headspace people also tend to be funnier, more fun and exciting and playful in general. It’s like bringing out a better self but not having to rely on “having a good day” to do it.
My top three ways to reconnect with the present moment right now are:
- Paraliminals. I reviewed these guided meditation cds a few months ago on the blog and they have become my favourite way to reconnect with present. I just plop down on my bed for 25 minutes or so to relax and listen. Afterwards I feel relaxed and energized and my self-talk tends to shut down or decrease significantly for maybe half a day. This makes it a lot easier to be in the present moment and just focus on what is going on right now.
- Focus on your breathing. Take belly breaths for a minute or two and just focus on them and nothing else.
- Focus on what’s right in front of you. Or around you. Or on you. Use your senses. Just look at what’s right in front of you right now. Listen to the sounds around you. Feel the fabric of your clothes and focus on how they feel. You can for instance use the summer sun or rain and how it feels on your skin to connect with the present.
6 Amazing Techniques to Staying Happy During a Stressful Project
Most of our work happiness comes from our relationship with ourselves. For example, I’m working on a program to help people work happier. As I’m putting all the research together, writing each section and making it all coherent, I hit walls that stall my progress.
A few months ago I actually flopped on the floor, let out a loud groan and died from exhaustion. Luckily, my wife was home, sprinkled some magic kisses upon me and I came back to life. :) My creativity was stalled by my own thoughts of inadequacy, fear, and anger. The person from whom I needed the most encouragement was myself, and I was being my own worst enemy.
I analyzed the internal problems I was having and their effect on my work. Each one represents a weakness of mine. I will show you how I deal with each one and how I’ve learned to use my weaknesses to my advantage.
1. Stay Focused on One Project at a Time
Most of the time, I have several things that I am trying to do at once. I could be writing an email and at the same time I am thinking about an upcoming meeting. This split distraction puts strain on my focus and affects the quality of my work.
I’ve noticed that my attention darts from thought to thought because there is no looming deadline. I’m not forced to produce. So when I need to focus, I set a timer to create a little stress. Stress can be good when it brings focus to a person’s life.
Depending on the task, I may set the timer for 30 minutes and try to knock the work out in that time frame. If I need more time, I let the timer beep at me and then I reset it for the appropriate amount of time. This allows me to focus on this one task without letting my ADD distract me.
2. Break The Project Down Into Tiny Chunks
The length of my list on any given day would scare even Warren Buffett. I expect too much and never feel satisfied.
Instead of getting a whole bunch of stuff done, my brain often shuts down in response to my overwhelming list. I need to figure out a way to reduce those negative thoughts by listening to them and reasoning with them. I have tried being a big bully and forcing myself to do work, but this technique always lacked results.
I’ve created a routine that allows me to handle my work load. When I realize that I have overextended my “to do” wish list, I stand up, breathe deep, and let out the air as I take a moment to refill my glass with water.
I then break down my first big task into twenty minute chunks. When the project seems more manageable, I pick an easier 20 minute chunk and accomplish it. By doing this I boost my confidence and get my emotions back into a positive state.
Once I’m feeling good again I don’t feel so overwhelmed by a mountain of work.
3. Split Your “To Do” List
I often feel overwhelmed as a result of my expectations. I expect to get too much work done. I’ve never been able to accomplish one of my massive “to do” lists in one day. So when my list gets too big I will sometimes split it into two lists.
I create a list that’s easy to complete. If I have four hours for work, I make the list equal to about two hours. The second list I call my bonus list.
Whenever I get to my bonus list I feel good about my accomplishments. A sense of accomplishment is the main reason for a list, so make your list achievable.
4. Take a “Weird” Break
I often get mentally locked up because I can’t focus on what is right before me. There are too many options. If I have to write an email, generate a report, and work on a marketing plan then I feel hot and cloudy. My overwhelmed mind just wants to shut down. I usually get up and take a “weird” break to clear my head.
During my break I do something a little weird like take a short walk and hang from a tree branch. I find that it’s tough to worry while hanging from a beautiful tree. Plus, my creativity almost always starts flowing again.
There are so many ways we can pull ourselves out of a stressful state if we just take a moment to be creative.
5. Connect Your Goals with Your Needs
“Each individual should work for himself. No one wants to sacrifice himself for the company. People come to work in the company to enjoy themselves.” - Soichiro Honda
There are times when I’m working on a big project and I get halfway through when I run out of steam. I’ve lost the motivation.
This is the point when I take a break and try to realign my needs and goals. If I find myself wondering why I’m working my butt off, then I’m the one creating this doubt. Maybe I want to find a new job or start my own business because I’m not receiving the gratitude that I feel I deserve. Whatever the reason for my doubt, I have to internally talk through these feelings. Of course I can talk through these problems with someone else, but it’s best to rely on myself first.
Once you figure out what your underlying needs are that aren’t being met, you can either let go of them and try to remotivate yourself or take action to make a change.
For example, maybe I want to become a better writer, get more organized, and lose 10 pounds.
I try to attach these needs to my work. Trying to become a better writer is easy to attach to my needs since I have to write for the program I am building. I’ll read a writing blog like Write to Done to get myself pumped up to write an awesome chapter.
Trying to become more organized is a little more difficult. I usually choose the obvious path and take fifteen minutes to straighten my desk. This helps me clear my head, feel positive about my surroundings and get back to the task at hand.
Trying to lose 10 pounds is the most difficult to connect with my work. A little creativity is a must. I created a quick reward system. Every time I finished writing one page, I would do 15 push-ups. This keeps me feeling positive about my writing accomplishments and my body.
If you are going to kick start your motivation, you need to find a way that your current work is helping out the future you.
6. Review the Positive
I often get too caught up in how the present moment makes me feel. I create a torturous thought process by magnifying the bad things that are happening to me at my job instead of focusing on all the good things that are there if I just take the time to notice them.
When I’m feeling particularly blue at the end of the day, I turn off my radio and make a mental list of all the things that I’m learning from the stressful project.
My job always pushes me outside of my comfort zone, causing me unrest. Managing stress, implementing big projects, writing clear emails, developing my social skills and all the other interactions that I have force me to become a better person.
I am getting paid to learn these lessons. That’s a gift.
By shifting my perspective to the positive, I’m able to let go of my negative thinking cycle and realign myself with the good things in my life.
What do you do to stay happy during a stressful project?
Thursday, July 2, 2009
GAME ABORTING
deo Games Absorbing and Work Not?
Written by Thomas Christopher
Friday, 12 June 2009 14:49
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Why don't people playing video games get distracted by work, rather than the other way around? More importantly, if we can understand why, can we use the knowledge to make productive work more attractive?
Saying that video games are more fun does not convey enough information. It's the kind of fun that matters.
Video games are absorbing. For insight into absorbing activities, let's look at Professor Csikszentmihalyi's research into what he called "flow" Flow is that condition in which you are totally occupied with the task you are doing. It has its name because people interviewed about it most frequently described the experience as being "in the flow." A flow experience has two benefits:
First, it promotes your happiness. This is a bit strange, because while you're in the flow you are not happy -- indeed you're not feeling any emotion. You are totally absorbed in your activity. You are not conscious of yourself. Nevertheless, people who spend a lot of time in the flow are happier the rest of the time.
Second, flow promotes your growth. As we shall see in a moment, to remain in the flow you must keep increasing your competence.
There are four conditions for flow. First, the activity you are involved in cannot be too complex. If it is too difficult for you, you will become anxious and drop out of the flow state.
Second, the activity cannot be too simple. If it is too simple, you will become bored and drop out of the flow state.
Third, you must always know what to do next. If you must pause to ponder what your next move is, that in itself will get you out of the flow.
Fourth, you must get immediate feedback on how well you are doing. You must be occupied with current activity and not looking back wondering how well you did nor looking ahead wondering how well you will have done.
While you're in the flow, you are practicing an activity, and as you practice the activity, you are gaining competence. That means that in order to remain in the flow, the activity must be getting more complex; otherwise, it would become too simple, you would become bored, and you would fall out of the flow. This is the way flow leads to growth.
Flow is a most satisfying state to be in. People seek it out. Given the opportunity, people will gravitate towards flow activities.
Flow is like a secular mystical state. The "Eighth Step" on the Buddhist eight-fold path is "right absorption." These games might be considered "wrong absorption," but absorption they are nonetheless.
In the current economic situation, many people are in a state very unlike flow: looking for jobs. For one thing, if you are looking for a job, you do not get immediate feedback. Indeed, if you're sending out resumes, for most of them you will get no feedback at all. You may not know what to do next: what kind of job to look for, where to look for it, how to apply, how wide an area to search in, whether to consider relocating. Some of the activities in job hunting are incredibly boring. On the other hand, some of the things you may need to do you are utterly unskilled at. It's no wonder that online job hunters spend so much time at video games -- video games are flow activities, and job hunting most assuredly is not.
This indicates how you can improve your performance in other activities -- plan them to promote flow.
When you're embarking on a new activity, it would be good if you could organize it so that you will always be in the flow. If you're taking a course, let us hope that it has been arranged so that you can be in the flow while learning. If you're going to have to teach yourself things, right at the beginning it will certainly look too complex: you don't know how little you can get away with knowing. But as soon as you know some of the most vital elements to include in your activity, you can try to work out a schedule that will make it possible for you to be in the flow.
In arranging a schedule, try to arrange to do simple activities that will give you a complete product or at least a complete part of a product, a complete something you can point to. Producing something will give you satisfaction. It is an indication that you are succeeding. That gives you feedback.
As you repeat the activity, combat boredom by including more aspects or making it more complex. Don't concentrate on the end result of your activity. Don't insist that other people see you as a success immediately. That will only delay feedback and promote anxiety. Instead, as you plan out the new activity, focus on the individual parts of it and ways to judge how well you're doing on those.
If you can plan out a new activity so that you can do it in the flow, it will be satisfying, promote your happiness, and develop your skills much more quickly than trying to force yourself to do it.
Dr. Christopher is offering a growing collection of online income stream courses and eBooks directed at speakers, writers, and self-employed professionals. Dr. Christopher, a Colorado public speaker and seminar leader, prepared these in response to requests from the Speakers In Colorado group.
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What Are You Waiting For?
Written by Dr. Robert Anthony
Thursday, 11 June 2009 12:46
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Are You Putting Off Your Dreams? Or have things slowed down recently? Is your life visibly changing the way you want it to? Or are you still stuck with the same problems?
I woke up today thinking about three people who contacted me this week concerning the progress they were making reaching their goals. They each said the same thing in a different way.
Although they all made good progress in the beginning, they are now all stalled. It's very frustrating for me because I got myself caught up in their dreams. I imagined how their lives would be when they've completed the changes they needed to make. I can easily see the benefits they will gain such as a much larger income, more satisfying relationships and the pride of knowing that they are doing exactly what they always wanted to do – and earning a great living from it.
It's also frustrating for another reason. Although I can see the finish line, they are standing still. The frustrating part of all this is they have all the tools necessary to succeed, but now they are stuck. So why have they stopped?
I can't say I know the answer for each of them. I'm sure there are many reasons. But I suspect there is one cause in every case. They have come to the point where they have done everything they could comfortably do and now they have arrived at a place where they've never been before. Any new step forward, represents a step out of their comfort zone.
If you want to improve the results in your life, you have to accept the fact that you can no longer do the same old things the same old way.
Making a commitment to change your life is a big step. It usually occurs when something has happened to make you realize that you are unhappy with some aspect of your life. Often this event or circumstance will jolt you into deciding that the time has finally come to change your current situation.
The charge that you get from deciding to change your situation will keep you going through the early stages of your transformation. For example, it can energize and motivate you to read a book, take a course, and even go through all the details of setting up a business. All those preparatory activities are necessary and good – but they amount to nothing unless you are able to get your dream started. And getting your dream started -- actually kicking your dream into action -- is new territory. New means strange. And strange means uncomfortable.
Having been involved with a number of very effective training programs over the years, I've been disappointed by how many bright and ambitious students fail to finish their training. And of those who finish, less ten percent turn their hard-earned skills into substantial or measurable results.
Then weeks or months later they look at the courses or programs they have taken and wonder, as I'm doing about these three people now: "What happened?"
If you feel that you were off to a good start but are currently stalled, you need to admit to yourself that you have probably slipped back into your comfort zone. More than likely you have been deceiving yourself that you are making progress, but at the same time you are really not getting anywhere.
What you need to do is take action. Even if it is a very small action. Nothing you can tell yourself, nothing you can say to others, nothing you can think or feel or imagine is going to get you out of the mental bog you're mired in. The only thing that can rescue you is – to take that next step.
Maybe you know what that is. If you know exactly what it is, DO IT! If you don't know, or aren't sure, allow you intuition to guide you. Do whatever you feel compelled to do, but do it NOW to get yourself going again -- even if it means entering your discomfort zone.
I said earlier, I am disappointed by how many people start to change their lives and then stall. Many of these people are good at the initial study phase, but lose pace when it comes time to make those next steps, transitioning from knowledge to action.
On the other hand, I'm thinking now about many people who have succeeded . . . about the hundreds of unsolicited letters I receive from people who have taken my “Secret of Deliberate Creation” program and are now living the lives they dreamed about. All they did was just FOLLOW THROUGH until they got results. They just applied simple steps outlined in the program and the changes were almost magical.
What is your dream? To become a freelance artist / writer / consultant? To own your own business? To become financially independent . . . perhaps even wealthy? Don't put off the success you've always dreamed about. My “Secret of Deliberate Creation” program will show you how to get started NOW and give yourself the jolt you need to make that final change to move you from where you are to where you want to be.
Want to discover more?
Visit www.thesecretofdeliberatecreation.com
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Task Ninja: Form the Action Habit
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Written by Leo Babauta
Thursday, 07 May 2009 14:27
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A lot of us get stuck in inaction –procrastinating, doing a lot of unimportant tasks to avoid the important stuff, worrying about failing or about being perfect, having a hard time starting, getting distracted, and so on.
It’s time to start forming the Action Habit instead.
And it’s really not that hard if you focus on it for a little while. Like any other habit, start in small doses, little tasks, just short bursts, and then build on that momentum.
Some quick steps for forming the Action Habit:
Figure out your key actions. Focusing on the right actions is just as important as the doing. Don’t spend a lot of time in this step — just quickly decide your Top 3 actions for today.
Pick one key action, and visualize the outcome. How will it look when you’re done? Again, don’t spend a lot of time here — just form a quick picture in your mind.
Just start. Tell yourself, “Do it now!” Make it a mantra. Don’t mess around with tools, with distractions, with anything that will get in the way of doing this task. Strip away everything but the task, and get going!
Focus on the moment. Just be in this task, don’t worry about the future or what mistakes you might make or might have made before. Just focus on doing this task, as best you can. Immerse yourself in it.
Get to done. Complete the task. Feel good about it! Pat yourself on the back!
Now repeat with the next task. The more you practice this habit, the better you get. Do it in small doses, and keep practicing. You’ll fail sometimes. See the next section for how to deal with that. But don’t let failure stop you — just practice some more.
Barriers to the Action Habit
But what if you’re having trouble actually taking action? Some quick thoughts:
Don’t worry about perfect. Too often we want to create the perfect plan, but while it’s important to know where you’re going, it’s more important not to get stuck in the planning mode. And while it’s important to do your best, perfection isn’t necessary.
Stop fiddling. Are you messing around with your software or other tools? Are you playing with fonts and colors and other non-essential things? Stop! Get back to the task.
Remove distractions. Turn off the phone, email, IM, Twitter, etc. Shut off the world around you, and just focus on the doing.
Improve it later. Just do it now. You can make it better later. Writers call this the sh*tty first draft — and while it sounds bad, it’s actually a good thing. You’re getting it done, even if it’s sloppy.
Break it into smaller chunks. Sometimes the task is too intimidating. If the task takes more than an hour, start with a 30-minute chunk. If that’s too big, do just 10 minutes. If that’s too hard, do 5. If you have to, just do 1 minute, just to get going.
Stop thinking so much. Thinking is a good thing. Overthinking isn’t, and it gets in the way. Put aside all the thinking (analysis paralysis) and just do.
If you can’t do something … figure out why. Maybe you don’t have the tools. Maybe you don’t have the authority. Maybe you need something from someone else. Maybe you’re missing some key info. Maybe you don’t know how to do something and need to read up on it, or be taught how. Maybe you just don’t want to do it, and you should drop it altogether. Figure out what the barrier is, and solve it.
Article Source: Zenhabits.net
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Dead Simple Guide to Beating Procrastination
Written by Leo Babauta
Thursday, 07 May 2009 14:24
I’ve been procrastinating a lot lately. I actually love procrastinating and have nothing against it.
But for those of you who want to beat procrastination, here are 10 simple steps:
First make sure you really, really, really want to do it. Seriously - don’t skip this step.
Keep things simple - don’t mess with tools, formatting, anything, just start.
Make it the first thing you do today, before checking email or anything else.
Clear away everything that stands in the way of doing. Including turning off the Internet.
Just get started. Overcome the initial barrier by diving in.
Tell yourself you’re just going to do 10 minutes.
Put something you dread more at the top of your to-do list — you’ll put off doing that by doing the other things on your list. (Structured procrastination.)
Find something about it that excites you.
Forget about perfection. Just start doing it, and fix it later.
If you keep procrastinating, re-evaluate whether you really want to do it. Consider not doing it, or putting it on the backburner.
If all else fails, just take a nap or go outside and enjoy the outdoors or do nothing. Life isn’t all about productivity. Do less.
Article source: Zenhabits.net
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Next Time and Up Until Now - Mistake Or Learning Experience?
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Written by Judy H. Wright
Thursday, 07 May 2009 14:23
If you've made a mistake recently and you feel like beating yourself up about it, take a moment to think. Will this mistake affect your happiness for the rest of your life? Probably not. Say to yourself, "next time!" and think about how you'll handle a similar situation if it ever happens again. You've learned from your mistake now, instead of letting it get you down into a negative mindset.
Next Time You Will Remember
Thinking of mistakes in terms of "next time" will put them in a more positive light. It's easy to think of making a mistake as a horrible failure, something that will destroy your dignity and make you just that much less of a person. This isn't true at all! Mistakes are impossible to avoid, because they're life's way of teaching you. By making mistakes and learning from them, we become wiser as individuals. So really, mistakes are a positive thing, in the long run.
Most of What You Do is Right
There is also a difference between failing one time, and "being a failure." Sometimes when we don't succeed at something, we call ourselves failures. This couldn't be farther from the truth. There's also a difference between making a mistake, and being a mistake. Most of what you do is done well, and done right. One mistake doesn't destroy the rest of your existence! Keep things in perspective, and you'll feel so much better about yourself as a whole.
If you're tempted to wallow in self-pity, take a step back and think. Maybe you feel you haven't done your best in the past, and that you made more mistakes than you wanted to, or than you should have. But instead of labeling yourself negatively, think "up until now." If your past isn't exactly how you'd like it to have been, remember that just because it was that way in the past, doesn't mean you can't change your own future.
Your past mistakes provide learning experiences.
Let them teach you how you want to act, achieve, and succeed in the future. You can always change the way you see things, and the way you see yourself. Remember you can always do it differently next time, and your life can change for the better.
For more encouragement toward building self-confidence, visit http://www.EncourageSelfConfidence.com - an affordable and very effective eCourse by Judy H. Wright also known as Auntie Artichoke, family relationship coach. Also join us for free Teleclasses every Thursday on enhancing family relationships. Sign up athttp://www.ArtichokePress.com You will be glad you did.
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The 5 Percent Trick: Finding Passion and Purpose in Life
Written by Albert
Thursday, 07 May 2009 14:21
Have you ever sat down and thought, “What is my purpose in life? What is my passion? Where do I go from here?”
These are some of the most common questions we have all struggled with. And I am not in a position to answer it – all I can offer in this article is an opinion, slightly different from the typical response.
Are Your Goals Yours?
This statement is everywhere, and yet it is ignored so often that it bears repeating: Your purpose is your own. No one can cramp themselves into another person’s definition of happiness and success and, well, expect to be happy and successful.
The difficulties arise at this point, because of our natural reactions: “Of course I am pursuing my own passion!” But are we?
Where do our ideas of success come from? Our parents, or the media, perhaps. Maybe society in general. Be rich; be handsome; be beautiful; be famous. Are these really your goals? Where did they really come from? Can you be absolutely sure that these things will make you happy? I’m not saying yes or no, I’m just asking. It is possible that these things truly do make you happy.
The Internal Goal
But why do I mention happiness and success in the same breath? The true goal behind what we pursue is often internal – and most of the time, this internal goal is simply to be happy. If you don’t believe me, try something simple: Look at a current external goal you have, and then begin to trace it down.
For example: You want a new job. Ask yourself why. Perhaps a higher salary, or to get away from a nasty employer? What then? An easier work environment or more free time. What then? What will you have? And simply repeat this process until you can’t get any more answers. Almost always, you will find that what you are left with is an internal goal.
One of my favorite stories – you might have heard it before. There was a big city businessman who once went on holiday to a faraway beach. One day he walked past a local fisherman who was lazing around, with his fishing rod in the water, enjoying the sun and a beer.
The city man’s mind went to work immediately. The fishing spot was a gold mine, and a serious fishing business would thrive in the area. “Why are you so stupid?” he asked the fisherman. “Get some boats, hire some extra hands, and in a few years you will turn your little shop into a million-dollar business!”
The local man asked him. “And what would you do once you have a million dollars?”
The city man stared back blankly. “Why, I would have so much free time I could sit around in the sun all day and drink beer!”
Again, this idea might seem so basic that it doesn’t need repeating. And yet it is resisted by many people as a knee-jerk reaction.I remember a speaker at a seminar once, who simply stated that one can be happy even if they are financially poor. That statement was met with a lot of sarcastic comments from the audience. And yet is it really so hard to believe?
A basic level of material resources are needed, yes. But beyond that, it really makes no difference. So why do we resist it or even feel the urge to attack such a statement? What does it challenge inside us? If one honestly tries to answer these questions, the answers can be revealing.
Turning Our Goals Around
And then what? Once we see our internal goals, try one thing. Turn the goals around – achieve the internal goals first. And if, after that, you still want the external goal, you’ll find it that much easier.
Do any of these sound familiar? Once I have money, I’ll be independent. Once I find a lover, I will have higher self-esteem. Once my spouse quits drinking so much, I will be happy.
Does the opposite not seem more logical? Develop your self-esteem first, and potential lovers will find you more attractive. Grow your independence and you will find it easier to make money. And perhaps if you are happier, your mate will not see the need to drink as much.
This road becomes easier to tread when we realize that internal goals are always achievable if we put in the time and effort. External goals can be subject to limitations that cannot be overcome, no matter how hard we try. It would be almost impossible for a sickly fifty year old to become a professional boxer, for instance. But if the man’s true, internal, goal was to build confidence, it does not matter how frail or old he is – it is always possible.
For those who don’t have an external purpose in mind, try seeking out an internal goal. Look to become happier, for instance, and as you begin to take steps, you might find that an external goal begins to reveal itself.
The Impermanency of Purpose
This becomes more important when we realize outer purposes are ultimately impermanent. Our external purpose changes to reflect our inner. Purposes are not permanent. Nothing is. Stop looking for something to do for the rest of your life – it might be possible to find something that lasts forever; but most likely it will simply change in accordance with your internal state and needs.
When I was younger, I put all my energies and time into the sport of boxing, even sacrificing work and study opportunities for my obsession. Boxing was a strange choice for me, because I didn’t have much talent, and I was the quiet, introverted type. But when I think back to it now, it made complete sense – it was to fulfill an intense inner need. I had to become stronger, more confident. I needed a safe outlet for my anger and frustration. When I achieved those goals, my obsession with boxing just dropped away on its own.
Deeply realizing that goals are impermanent will also contribute to our inner peace. Here is one to stimulate thought – if you are seeking fulfillment through your external purpose, what happens when it comes to an end? It is certainly admirable to aim to be the best parent you can be, for example, but what will happen when one day your children become old enough to leave the house? When that happens, one can cling to the purpose, resist, and suffer. Or one can simply let it go, and continue in peace.
The Need for Action
Naturally, there is a time for planning and thinking, but there is also a time for action. Many people who are seeking or rethinking their life purpose stay stuck in the introspection. Maybe they do this to avoid taking risks, for fear of leaving their comfort zone, to avoid disapproval, or any other fear. And in doing so, they remain stuck in a rut.
Sometimes, the best way to find a purpose in life is to go out there and take action, even if we don’t know what we are doing!
My favorite tool at this stage is the 5% statement, created by Nathaniel Branden, who is widely considered to be the father of the self-esteem movement. It works by allowing you to take steps in small increments. Trying to change completely overnight, as some might suggest, often creates fear, uncertainty, and resistance.
A 5% statement is split into 2 halves. Examples would be:
If I were to be 5% more responsible today, I would ___________.
If I were to be 5% less lazy today, I would ___________.
The first part of the statement doesn’t have to change. But every morning when we wake up, we think of something that fills in blank, and then do it! As you can see, 5% is small and harmless enough to let us overcome our fears and procrastination. Being flexible enough to do different things everyday in pursuit of the same goal also keeps us from boredom and routine. Even better, it encourages us to think of new ideas to try (although we can simply do the same activity 5% more each time).
You can use this for anything you plan to do – begin a new exercise routine, reduce procrastination, improve your workflow, or even your personal relationships. And if 5% seems too little, don’t worry – it builds up rather beautifully.
Once momentum begins, sometimes the difficulty comes in stopping!
Why Are Video Games Absorbing and Work Not?
Why Are Video Games Absorbing and Work Not?
Written by Thomas Christopher
Friday, 12 June 2009 14:49
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Why don't people playing video games get distracted by work, rather than the other way around? More importantly, if we can understand why, can we use the knowledge to make productive work more attractive?
Saying that video games are more fun does not convey enough information. It's the kind of fun that matters.
Video games are absorbing. For insight into absorbing activities, let's look at Professor Csikszentmihalyi's research into what he called "flow" Flow is that condition in which you are totally occupied with the task you are doing. It has its name because people interviewed about it most frequently described the experience as being "in the flow." A flow experience has two benefits:
First, it promotes your happiness. This is a bit strange, because while you're in the flow you are not happy -- indeed you're not feeling any emotion. You are totally absorbed in your activity. You are not conscious of yourself. Nevertheless, people who spend a lot of time in the flow are happier the rest of the time.
Second, flow promotes your growth. As we shall see in a moment, to remain in the flow you must keep increasing your competence.
There are four conditions for flow. First, the activity you are involved in cannot be too complex. If it is too difficult for you, you will become anxious and drop out of the flow state.
Second, the activity cannot be too simple. If it is too simple, you will become bored and drop out of the flow state.
Third, you must always know what to do next. If you must pause to ponder what your next move is, that in itself will get you out of the flow.
Fourth, you must get immediate feedback on how well you are doing. You must be occupied with current activity and not looking back wondering how well you did nor looking ahead wondering how well you will have done.
While you're in the flow, you are practicing an activity, and as you practice the activity, you are gaining competence. That means that in order to remain in the flow, the activity must be getting more complex; otherwise, it would become too simple, you would become bored, and you would fall out of the flow. This is the way flow leads to growth.
Flow is a most satisfying state to be in. People seek it out. Given the opportunity, people will gravitate towards flow activities.
Flow is like a secular mystical state. The "Eighth Step" on the Buddhist eight-fold path is "right absorption." These games might be considered "wrong absorption," but absorption they are nonetheless.
In the current economic situation, many people are in a state very unlike flow: looking for jobs. For one thing, if you are looking for a job, you do not get immediate feedback. Indeed, if you're sending out resumes, for most of them you will get no feedback at all. You may not know what to do next: what kind of job to look for, where to look for it, how to apply, how wide an area to search in, whether to consider relocating. Some of the activities in job hunting are incredibly boring. On the other hand, some of the things you may need to do you are utterly unskilled at. It's no wonder that online job hunters spend so much time at video games -- video games are flow activities, and job hunting most assuredly is not.
This indicates how you can improve your performance in other activities -- plan them to promote flow.
When you're embarking on a new activity, it would be good if you could organize it so that you will always be in the flow. If you're taking a course, let us hope that it has been arranged so that you can be in the flow while learning. If you're going to have to teach yourself things, right at the beginning it will certainly look too complex: you don't know how little you can get away with knowing. But as soon as you know some of the most vital elements to include in your activity, you can try to work out a schedule that will make it possible for you to be in the flow.
In arranging a schedule, try to arrange to do simple activities that will give you a complete product or at least a complete part of a product, a complete something you can point to. Producing something will give you satisfaction. It is an indication that you are succeeding. That gives you feedback.
As you repeat the activity, combat boredom by including more aspects or making it more complex. Don't concentrate on the end result of your activity. Don't insist that other people see you as a success immediately. That will only delay feedback and promote anxiety. Instead, as you plan out the new activity, focus on the individual parts of it and ways to judge how well you're doing on those.
If you can plan out a new activity so that you can do it in the flow, it will be satisfying, promote your happiness, and develop your skills much more quickly than trying to force yourself to do it.
Dr. Christopher is offering a growing collection of online income stream courses and eBooks directed at speakers, writers, and self-employed professionals. Dr. Christopher, a Colorado public speaker and seminar leader, prepared these in response to requests from the Speakers In Colorado group.
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What Are You Waiting For?
Written by Dr. Robert Anthony
Thursday, 11 June 2009 12:46
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Are You Putting Off Your Dreams? Or have things slowed down recently? Is your life visibly changing the way you want it to? Or are you still stuck with the same problems?
I woke up today thinking about three people who contacted me this week concerning the progress they were making reaching their goals. They each said the same thing in a different way.
Although they all made good progress in the beginning, they are now all stalled. It's very frustrating for me because I got myself caught up in their dreams. I imagined how their lives would be when they've completed the changes they needed to make. I can easily see the benefits they will gain such as a much larger income, more satisfying relationships and the pride of knowing that they are doing exactly what they always wanted to do – and earning a great living from it.
It's also frustrating for another reason. Although I can see the finish line, they are standing still. The frustrating part of all this is they have all the tools necessary to succeed, but now they are stuck. So why have they stopped?
I can't say I know the answer for each of them. I'm sure there are many reasons. But I suspect there is one cause in every case. They have come to the point where they have done everything they could comfortably do and now they have arrived at a place where they've never been before. Any new step forward, represents a step out of their comfort zone.
If you want to improve the results in your life, you have to accept the fact that you can no longer do the same old things the same old way.
Making a commitment to change your life is a big step. It usually occurs when something has happened to make you realize that you are unhappy with some aspect of your life. Often this event or circumstance will jolt you into deciding that the time has finally come to change your current situation.
The charge that you get from deciding to change your situation will keep you going through the early stages of your transformation. For example, it can energize and motivate you to read a book, take a course, and even go through all the details of setting up a business. All those preparatory activities are necessary and good – but they amount to nothing unless you are able to get your dream started. And getting your dream started -- actually kicking your dream into action -- is new territory. New means strange. And strange means uncomfortable.
Having been involved with a number of very effective training programs over the years, I've been disappointed by how many bright and ambitious students fail to finish their training. And of those who finish, less ten percent turn their hard-earned skills into substantial or measurable results.
Then weeks or months later they look at the courses or programs they have taken and wonder, as I'm doing about these three people now: "What happened?"
If you feel that you were off to a good start but are currently stalled, you need to admit to yourself that you have probably slipped back into your comfort zone. More than likely you have been deceiving yourself that you are making progress, but at the same time you are really not getting anywhere.
What you need to do is take action. Even if it is a very small action. Nothing you can tell yourself, nothing you can say to others, nothing you can think or feel or imagine is going to get you out of the mental bog you're mired in. The only thing that can rescue you is – to take that next step.
Maybe you know what that is. If you know exactly what it is, DO IT! If you don't know, or aren't sure, allow you intuition to guide you. Do whatever you feel compelled to do, but do it NOW to get yourself going again -- even if it means entering your discomfort zone.
I said earlier, I am disappointed by how many people start to change their lives and then stall. Many of these people are good at the initial study phase, but lose pace when it comes time to make those next steps, transitioning from knowledge to action.
On the other hand, I'm thinking now about many people who have succeeded . . . about the hundreds of unsolicited letters I receive from people who have taken my “Secret of Deliberate Creation” program and are now living the lives they dreamed about. All they did was just FOLLOW THROUGH until they got results. They just applied simple steps outlined in the program and the changes were almost magical.
What is your dream? To become a freelance artist / writer / consultant? To own your own business? To become financially independent . . . perhaps even wealthy? Don't put off the success you've always dreamed about. My “Secret of Deliberate Creation” program will show you how to get started NOW and give yourself the jolt you need to make that final change to move you from where you are to where you want to be.
Monday, June 29, 2009
A New Discovery Of An Old Secret
I discovered that there is only one simple root cause of all problems. When this primal cause becomes known, understood and properly applied, all problems disappear like snowflakes on a hot griddle. In fact this discovery launched me on a life-long career as a professional problem solver for a widely diverse personal, professional and corporate client base that included many of the giants of American business.
I had discovered the law of opposites.
Take just a minute and think about the world you live in. Have you ever noticed how everything you're involved in is comprised of opposites? Opposites abound everywhere and in every situation. Webster has many definitions for opposites but they are best summed up in the one where he defines opposites as "elements that are so far apart as to be totally irreconcilable".
For example, we have such irreconcilable opposites as up and down, left and right, short and tall, light and dark, assets and liabilities, success and failure, freedom and bondage and on and on and on. I doubt that you think of anything that does not have an implied opposite
Think about it: We live in a world of division. We live in a world where "twoness" prevails; a world of duality where very position, situation and condition is challenged by some alternative where one side is always pulling against another or pushing up against a wall that will not yield.
This is living in a world that is perfectly designed to promote struggle, turmoil, conflict, confusion, disputes and disagreements. This law of opposites is the cause of all problems. Without knowing how to control or overcome this law of opposites, people try to adapt to it without realizing that by so doing they only succeed in increasing their frustrations and prolonging any solution. Is it any wonder that so many people are suffering such pressures, stresses and anxieties!
If these people could somehow prevent this law from operating in their individual experiences they could enjoy living is a world where oneness prevailed and those things we call problems would have no influence over them.
This might be best illustrated by using such familiar opposites as positive and negative. Positives and negatives are opposites and have nothing in common. They cannot mix or commingle. Neither can one be described in term of the other. Try as you might, you cannot successfully justify one to the other. They are opposites. It is the law!
A problem is defined by Webster as "an intricate, unsettled question without an answer; a source of perplexity and vexation". By their very nature, problems are negative. Webster defines "negative" as "something that is the opposite, or negation, of something". That "something" is the positiveness of the problem's solution. Webster's definition of "positive" is "that which is real, not speculative, not fictitious and logically affirmative; that which has actual existence".
Just as a negative has absolutely no positive characteristics, so a positive has absolutely no negative characteristics. They are opposites. It is the law! And because it is an absolute, universal law it is not subject to chance, change, modification, circumvention or debate. It maintains its own integrity, is self- enforcing and works simply because it exists…forever! When properly applied it is your absolute assurance of successful conclusions.
The problem is negative and unreal. The objective is positive and real. Logic, then, demands that in order to experience your goal or objective or receive the answer to your question, you must discipline yourself to maintain a mind-set that is responsive to the positive ideas that will dissolve your negative problems.
This is probably the most demanding discipline you will ever be faced with because we've been trained to accept both positives and negatives as real. From this premise, we attempt to solve a problem by confronting it as an adversary with which we are compelled to do battle. We try to "understand" it and "deal" with it as though it were a reality instead of simply being a negation of that which we are seeking.
Does all this sound too abstract to be practical in what we call the "real" world of nuts and bolts? While individual circumstances will vary, the procedural application of this law is always the same. ( See my article "Taking the Problem Out of Problem Solving") Consider this case study: Static sale plagued a company and great effort and money was invested to find some means by which they could increase the sales volume of their product. Their best efforts failed and they resigned themselves to the conviction that the market was flooded to the point of saturation and nothing further could be done. They were prepared to "eat their losses" and move on.
Then the principles embodied in this discovery were initiated by one individual who, in the secrecy of his own thought, maintained the integrity of this positive, constructive, solution oriented approach. He mentally rejected all discussions that focused on the "problem" even though circumstances required that he be involved in them. Soon a plan began developing in his thought. Every detail of a brand new merchandising procedure unfolded that was a radical departure from all traditional methods. The plan was implemented and sales increased immediately to a level that far exceeded the company's most optimistic projections. As an added bonus, the implementation of this plan did not require any additional capital expenditures.
This confirms Victor Hugo's statement that, "there is nothing more powerful than the right idea whose time has come".
The sales "problem" simply disappeared. Why? Because, being an unreal negation, it never did have the substance or reality of its positive opposite. Where did the problem go? It went to the same place the flat world went as soon as Columbus discovered that it was really round. It didn't "go" anywhere because it wasn't a real "something" to begin with!
Details of this discovery are fully outlined in a logical continuity of demonstrable natural laws and principles in my latest book "The DYNAMICS of ACHIEVEMENT".
For more than 40 years Davis Goss has been a creative consultant with particular expertise in problem solving for widely divers client base that has included many of the giants of American business. His latest book, "The DYNAMICS of ACHIEVEMENT": outlines the details of his unique problem solving methods that are based solely on proven scientific principles.
Davis Goss has had more than 40 years experience as a creative consultant to the benefit of a widely diverse client base that has included amny nof the giants of American busibess. His particular expertise in problem solving and new product development. His latest book "The DYNAMICS of ACHIEVEMENT" details the continuity of his scientific approach whichis based solely on natural laws and principles. http://www.davisgoss.com
ideaguy@davisgoss.com
You Are What You Believe
When people under achieve in any part of their life, it is their beliefs more than anything else that hold them back. Self-limiting beleifs act as breaks on our ability to achieve our goals. Many of us have high hopes, dreams, and aspirations, but we let doubts creep in and undermine our talents, abilities, and effectiveness.
Each one of us has feelings of inferiority because we feel that we are not good enough. We think that we are not as good as other people, and we feel that we are not good enough to acquire and enjoy the things we want in life. Often we feel that we don't deserve good things. Even if we work hard and have some achievements in our life, we often feel that we are not really entitled to our successes.
The Universal Law of Belief says that whatever we believe, with feeling becomes our reality. We don't beleive what we see; instead, we see what we believe. Our beliefs form a screen as to how we see the world, and we never allow any information that is not consistent with our beliefs to pass through it. Even if we have beliefs that are totally inconsistent with reality, we won't let them through because our beliefs have become true for us.
The most common and also the most harmful beliefs are the ones that are self-limiting. These are beliefs about yourself. For example, believing that you can't acheive something because you don't have enough money or education. You might believe you can't acheive something because you are the wrong sex, race, age, or it is because of the economy. Most of these beliefs are not true, but they will hold you back nonetheless.
The fact is, you deserve every good thing that you are capable of acquiring through the use of your talents. The only real limitation on what you can be and have, is if you lack the desire. If you you set a goal and want to achieve it badly enough, nothing in the world can stop you from achieving it, as long as you're willing to persist long and hard enough.
To develop positive beliefs, you have to decide exactly where you want to end up in the future. The clearer you are about the result you want in your future, the easier it will be for you to change your actions and behaviors in the short term. This in turn,will assure that you achieve what you want in the long term.
Once you've clearly decided on the type of person you want to be, you will have already taken a major first step in developing new beliefs. In order to incorporate your new beliefs into your every day life, you have to discipline yourself to act exactly in every situation as if you already were that person. When you begin to act like the successful person you want to become, you will actually adopt their values, qualities, and characteristics. And they will then become a permanent part of your personality.
If you consistently act like the person you want to become every day and in every situation it will begin a chain reaction. Your attitude will change and become more postive. This will then build stronger and more postive beliefs. And your beliefs will then, exert a positive influence on your values.
You have no limitations on your potential except for those that you believe you have. Successful people are not extraordinary or special in any way. They are not different from you or I. But, all successful people do have the unwavering belief that they can accomplish anything that they really want in life. You are a good person. From this day forward, see yourself as the very best you can be, and refuse to accept any limitations on your possibilities. Once you develop that belief in yourself, and you act in accordance with your beliefs, your future will be unlimited.
All contents Copyright(c) 2004 by Joe Love and JLM & Associates, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide.
Joe Love draws on his 25 years of experience helping both individuals and companies build their businesses, increase profits, and achieve total success. A former ad agency executive and marketing consultant, Joe's work in personal development focuses on helping clients identify hidden marketable assets that create windfall opportunities and profits, as well as sound personal happiness and peace.
For Joe, success in life is the comprehensive product of greater wealth and income, better personal relationships, and productive attitudes and environments. He started his personal development services because he sensed a strong need for caring, personalized, and flexible mentoring to individuals from all backgrounds and professions.
Reach Joe at: joe@jlmandassociates.com
Read more articles and newsletters at: http://www.jlmandassociates.com
You Are What You Believe
When people under achieve in any part of their life, it is their beliefs more than anything else that hold them back. Self-limiting beleifs act as breaks on our ability to achieve our goals. Many of us have high hopes, dreams, and aspirations, but we let doubts creep in and undermine our talents, abilities, and effectiveness.
Each one of us has feelings of inferiority because we feel that we are not good enough. We think that we are not as good as other people, and we feel that we are not good enough to acquire and enjoy the things we want in life. Often we feel that we don't deserve good things. Even if we work hard and have some achievements in our life, we often feel that we are not really entitled to our successes.
The Universal Law of Belief says that whatever we believe, with feeling becomes our reality. We don't beleive what we see; instead, we see what we believe. Our beliefs form a screen as to how we see the world, and we never allow any information that is not consistent with our beliefs to pass through it. Even if we have beliefs that are totally inconsistent with reality, we won't let them through because our beliefs have become true for us.
The most common and also the most harmful beliefs are the ones that are self-limiting. These are beliefs about yourself. For example, believing that you can't acheive something because you don't have enough money or education. You might believe you can't acheive something because you are the wrong sex, race, age, or it is because of the economy. Most of these beliefs are not true, but they will hold you back nonetheless.
The fact is, you deserve every good thing that you are capable of acquiring through the use of your talents. The only real limitation on what you can be and have, is if you lack the desire. If you you set a goal and want to achieve it badly enough, nothing in the world can stop you from achieving it, as long as you're willing to persist long and hard enough.
To develop positive beliefs, you have to decide exactly where you want to end up in the future. The clearer you are about the result you want in your future, the easier it will be for you to change your actions and behaviors in the short term. This in turn,will assure that you achieve what you want in the long term.
Once you've clearly decided on the type of person you want to be, you will have already taken a major first step in developing new beliefs. In order to incorporate your new beliefs into your every day life, you have to discipline yourself to act exactly in every situation as if you already were that person. When you begin to act like the successful person you want to become, you will actually adopt their values, qualities, and characteristics. And they will then become a permanent part of your personality.
If you consistently act like the person you want to become every day and in every situation it will begin a chain reaction. Your attitude will change and become more postive. This will then build stronger and more postive beliefs. And your beliefs will then, exert a positive influence on your values.
You have no limitations on your potential except for those that you believe you have. Successful people are not extraordinary or special in any way. They are not different from you or I. But, all successful people do have the unwavering belief that they can accomplish anything that they really want in life. You are a good person. From this day forward, see yourself as the very best you can be, and refuse to accept any limitations on your possibilities. Once you develop that belief in yourself, and you act in accordance with your beliefs, your future will be unlimited.
All contents Copyright(c) 2004 by Joe Love and JLM & Associates, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide.
Joe Love draws on his 25 years of experience helping both individuals and companies build their businesses, increase profits, and achieve total success. A former ad agency executive and marketing consultant, Joe's work in personal development focuses on helping clients identify hidden marketable assets that create windfall opportunities and profits, as well as sound personal happiness and peace.
For Joe, success in life is the comprehensive product of greater wealth and income, better personal relationships, and productive attitudes and environments. He started his personal development services because he sensed a strong need for caring, personalized, and flexible mentoring to individuals from all backgrounds and professions.
Reach Joe at: joe@jlmandassociates.com
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